Sunday, August 16, 2009

Never having them at all!


This weekend was a lazy weekend, where I could watch TV, clean house, go out to eat, cook dinner, and do whatever else I wanted. 

I had heard about this show on Discovery called “Freebirthing”, and I was intrigued because I like the show “I Didn’t know I was pregnant”, even though it is the scariest thing in the world.

Until now.

Let me give you the premise of “Freebirthing.”  It is where ordinary women decide to forgo doctors, midwives, medicine, and have the babies at home. unassisted. I saw the first lady have a baby with her 2 year old son watching from the end of the bed, while her one leg was thrown up in the air, and a head coming through!  Which I thought was pretty gross.  So I pushed Record, so my husband could see it later.  I did not watch the rest of it.

Until Later.

With my husband, and we are never having kids.  The second woman having a baby unassisted was way grosser.  She was buck naked, and in the doggy style position with her helper behind her.  She was screaming and making awful noises, THEN all of the sudden you hear this loud gush of liquid, and baby falls flat on the ground!!!!!!

That sound made me almost throw up.

Then I called my mother and asked if that really happened.  She said it does, but the pain goes away as soon as the baby comes out.  She had me at the hospital, naturally.  I am the youngest.

I told her I was not giving her grandchildren.

Although now I think it would be better if I didn’t know I was pregnant, so I would not have 9 months to think about it.  

I am scarred for life.

5 Ways to Agree/Disagree with me!:

Mrs. D said...

LOL! I love that you called your mom to ask if that really happened!

It's not like that if you have a c-section, so don't rule out kids just yet. Although I can see how watching natural childbirth could make you think otherwise ;-)

And I think going without pain meds would be bad enough, let alone doing it at home "freestyle". That's crazy!

Kristina P. said...

Oh, man, I need to email you this blog of a women who did that, in her living room, in her pool. And then after the baby was born, her husband got IN THE BLOODY POOL, while she breastfed. This is on a public blog. She has also posted recipes in which you can use breastmilk.

Grand Pooba said...

Yikes! Ok, you've convinced me! I'm not ever having kids either!

Heather said...

You should never watch these shows until AFTER you've had your first baby! Or at least until you're pregnant and you're stuck! Trust me, go to the hospital, get the drugs from the nice man, and don't worry about how you look with one leg thrown over your head. The nice people with the plastic gloves and face masks have seen it all!

blueviolet said...

When you're having a baby, you could care less what you look like, who's looking at you, and what you're just want that lump of babitude OUT!